September 11th, 2001

Shorthand will not do; each syllable matters.

Cocoon

A shell of protection, this choice I've made

To hide away indefinitely until

This fragile, silken wall peels

Away revealing new life.

The barrier is temporary and thin—

Easily broken when the time is right.

But now I must collect myself.

Be still awhile.

Take pains with my words, listen more,

Defy the urgency of unnecessary things.

Spinning this private insulation 

Preserves me heart and soul

In these jostling, jarring times.

Whispered prayers for new life

to come as I emerge from this case

of gauzy gray.

Chrysalis--gold.

All that remains

when death and destruction

are burned away and

new life comes on quiet, fragile wings.       

I will fly, I will land, see the world       

in a new way.

I will remember.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
In September of 2001 my daughter and I celebrated her graduation from culinary school with a trip to New York City to meet Ruth Reichl, then Editor of Gourmet Magazine and author of three of our favorite books. We'd spent five glorious days in and around Brooklyn and on September 10th in the evening, met my nephew for drinks at the Windows on the World restaurant in Manhattan.  A tremendous summer thunderstorm came through that night—lightning strikes, rain in buckets…we were soaked but dried out as we took the subway home
The next morning was the day of our appointment—I remember a voicemail, 'See you at 11 on the 11th' , from Ruth's assistant. 

We awoke to a crystal clear, blue sky day. And then the earth moved, the sky filled with ashes and paper glitter and we were forever changed.
When we returned home to Washington, I was in shock for six weeks, although I didn't know it at the time.
I couldn't talk on the phone and cook dinner at the same time.
I had to be still whenever possible.
Simultaneous input verbally and visually was overwhelming.
I walked through the days wrapped in cotton, and as I was able, gingerly wrapped words around that September Day.

I will never forget.

*****

Photo credit: Paul Silas Collins, 2023

This poem first appeared on my website in 2012.